Thank You Very Much

I wanna play, I wanna play. Everything pissed me off Monday, but today's actually a great day, it's almost Friday. Score. I wanted to play today because I haven't blogged in awhile, but I can't think of anything to blog. I was fully-loaded Monday, but I opted for the couch when I got home instead and now the moment has passed. I can think of nothing that is peeving me. And that's not normal for me ... I am straining, trying hard to push something out ... but I just can't do it. My brain is constipated. I have to break your rules Kmama and play nice today ... For everyone else who wants to read some serious sarcasm, click the button and play along.

To T-Bone, who must have had stones dropped on your head at work causing you to bring a dozen roses to my house for me AND a bundle of summer flowers for Sydnerella because you wanted to be the first boy to give her flowers ... Thank You Very Much. (seriously dude, what's gotten in to you ...?)

 

To my favorite little Swede with hot wax for chosing to rip private hair off strangers bodies for a living, Thank You Very Much.

And that's all I got ...

Working Mommy Wednesday (and Hump Day)

First things first ... I got my sex on this weekend ... three times!

Thank you, thank you. Moving on .....

Today, I decided to take part in Working Mommy Wednesday over at Work, Wife, Mom ... Life, introduced to me by my bestest Texas friend Aunt Crazy a few weeks ago. Although I'm not a wife, at least not the acceptable sense that most married woman are, I am a working mom ... and I swear, when you see a blog posted by me at 2pm on a weekday, I AM working. Just kinda in between projects ... or something along those lines. It's okay, really it is. IT is doing their rounds updating security on "questionable" machines as we speak and I wasn't on that list ... I just minimized blogger while he popped in to tell me my machine is A-O-K. Again ...

Back to Working Mommy Wednesday. Todays question is WHAT ARE YOUR BEST MONEY SAVING TIPS?

I'll start with how I've saved money in the last year ... and let me tell ya, these weren't exactly choices I made. I was perfectly content before, just living in my rented house, going to the casino and spending sometimes hundreds of dollars a month at the black jack table, drinking caesars, and taking cabs home. I also enjoyed the freedom of accidently spending more money at Winners than I needed to, and it being okay because I made decent money for a single mom. A single mom who rented! Along came July 2009, when I decided pretty much out of the blue to buy a house. Slowly and steadily, but surely, I've been left with less and less money after pay days. I'm still struggling with WHY, but it is my assumption that it has something to do with being a big girl now - having a mortgage, property taxes, and everything else that comes with owning versus renting your home. Ouch, yuck, and what was I thinking? Not to mention the fact that when shit breaks, I have to fix it. Or I should say .. my faux-husband has a lot more to do around my house now than when I rented. But it's a nice house, a house I am proud to own, and in 29 years, I'll be mortgage free. If I maintain my new money saving ways. And if I can control my teenagers outlook on finances. Like when I say I don't have money, how she simply tells me to go the machine .... if it were only that easy sweetie! 

I've given up most of my gambling habits. I still buy lottery tickets and ever since T-Bone tought me to play poker, I like to play $5 games with him and his friends. Sometimes I even win. But I don't go the casino anymore and sometimes, I miss it so.

I also drink less. Not because I think it's the healthy thing to do, but because I physically can't handle to drink as much as I used to. We've talked about this ... sigh ... it's probably for the better though, what with the raging alcoholism in my family n all.

When it comes to clothes shopping, I started going to this cute little second hand store close to my house. Although, this really isn't to save money.  It's because I've mysteriously been outgrowing all my clothes and I'm sure that one day, I'll wake up and they'll all fit again. It just wouldn't make sense to buy a whole new wardrobe two sizes bigger.

I'm also lucky enough to be surrounded by grocery stores. I can pick n choose where I want to buy certain things, and each store is barely a few blocks away from the next. When I feel like gambling, I go to Co-Op. It's the most expensive, but if you hit the right sales on the right day, you win. But you need your little club card. No card, no sale. Safeway is similar, minus the gas cash I collect at Co-Op. I save a buck on groceries everytime I fill up my car. Sa-weet. Then there's Super Store. In NE Calgary. That is a rare trip for me, usually when I feel like I've been bad and deserve to be punished. And it saves me the most money. You can either go when you are in a bad mood to get some agression out, or go when you have three spare hours .. which as a single working parent, I surprisingly have a lot of those ... But you have to be prepared. And armed.

I also buy as many store-brand items as I can get away with. Although some people are pretty particular with food or house hold items brands, I honestly can't tell the difference with most items. Toilet paper is not one of those items though. $10 for 24 rolls if I have to, sorry, not compromising there. I don't like to touch my own pee. Sydnerella asked me recently if we can stop buying the white boxes when we win the lottery ... Oops, have I passed my imaginary safety net on to my daughter?

And my most recent money saving idea this year was bundling my land line with my internet and cable provider. I saved about $20 in doing this. But then I added the movie channels and rented another cable box for the house, so I guess that does't count. But the initiative was there.

A few other little things I do to save money is drinking my office coffee instead of stopping at timmy hos for $1.64 large double double every morning. And I'm sadly giving up parking down town more and more. I just can't justify $25 a day ... sometimes I can, but mainly, I know I can be doing better things with that money ... For instance, a three day break from parking at work pays my house cleaners for a month. And that really was the only goal I had a year ago ... figure out a way to afford to buy a house AND for someone to clean it. 

Click on the button to read more money saving tips or to play along.

a Canadian girl in Texas

Welcome me back! Back to Canada from Texas Tuesday night, and back to work just yesterday. Boo. I have no idea where this blog post will go from here, or where it will end up, or when it will be posted, but let me first prepare by trying to decide where to start ... I can start with the fact that I haven't got lucky in almost three weeks and that my sex drive has been murdered. I can start with telling you about the night I went to Coyote Ugly in San Antonio (I know what you want to ask me .. and the answer us Oh. Yes. I. Did.) I can start with telling you that I'd been sleeping with a woman most of the last 8 days, Aunt Crazy as a matter of fact. And No, that has nothing to do with the fact that my sex drive has been murdered ... girl on girl would not disappoint I assume ... just sayin .... I can also start with the explanation of my involvement in this news headline: "New Braunfels Police Officer Recovering After Weekend Assault - Suspect Released on Bond" ... Well, involvement might be a little misleading .... 

Let's go back to my early days as a mom for a quick minute for a quick explanation. I was 20 years old. I had a toddler in daycare. My first office job. And time to kill as an under-paid receptionist. What began as a simple question I posted on a womans forum on MSN asking for advice on something related to my kid, my job, or my dickhead baby-daddy has developed into a ten year friendship with some of the best women Canada and the US has to offer. Yes, I said the US, American friends? Who'd-a-thunk it? Without getting into too much detail, a tight bond developed. Tighter than the average persons respect for company internet usage. Between our private Moms and Parenting group on MSN, chatting on instant messenger, doing Secret Santa gift exchanges, and much more, our "internet group" became simply a group of friends from all over North America. We're still an internet group of course, but we more commonly go by LIG - the Lesbian Internet Group - although I'm not sure we even have a lesbian amongst us ... hey, ya never know. Maybe they don't even know. You'll have to visit Aunt Crazy's blog for an explanation on LIG because I wasn't there that year. Anyway, the first time I decided to take part in the Moms and Parenting Reunion was in 2006. I finally earned enough money to pay more than one bill a month and to eat more than just balogna for dinner and our Moms and Parenting group had been meeting on these annual trips since 2003. The pictures looked not only harmless, but down right fun. And at that stage in my life, I was looking for some goddam fun! So in July 2006, I was on my way to Branson, Missouri. As my plane was touching down in St. Louis alllll the way from Calgary, Alberta, Canada, I was struck with a scary thought .... "what the fuck did I just do?" I spent a bazillion dollars and took off over 3,000 kilometers from home to spend five days with 11 other people, who, for all I knew, were men posed as women, looking to have their way with a shy pale Canadian girl. Obviously, this wasn't the case and I had a great time. In 2007, I drank too much in Vegas and acted snooty-rich by sending my kid to horse camp and was unable to attend the reunion. But in July 2008, I hopped on a plane once again and joined the group in Texas. Seguin to be exact, about 40 miles from San Antonio. That trip was thee best trip I've had in my life as a single woman. As a mother with her child safely over 3,000 kilometers away. Repeated at the same location in 2009. And just repeated again in 2010. As a matter of fact, 1 week ago to the hour that I started typing this up (because I'm slow like that), I was sweating my ass off at the San Antonio International Airport having a smoke, waiting for two of my American friends to land so we could hop in a rented, air conditioned car and speed to the large house on the Guadalupe River in Seguin, Texas where the rest of our friends would be waiting, or arriving soon.

When we're in Texas, we spend our days shopping for food, outlet priced souvenirs and clothes and Coach bags, Marlboro menthols, and liquor. And liquor. And finally, liquor. We eat, drink, talk, laugh, dance, cry, gossip, sit in silence, relax, and behave in ways that some might not want their children to see (2008 pic)

This year, we spent an evening on the River Walk in San Antonio, where we ate a fun place called ... 

Here, I learnt that I spit, 1 friend swallows (same friend who taught us how to give hand jobs one year so that made sense) ...

... another friend spreads like butter after two drinks, another friend that shaves her kitty, another friend has a rash, another friend who is a ho fo sho, and many more interesting, but obviously false (some true ...) tidbits about all my girls. Or my bitches, as we so lovingly call each other. From Dicks, we walked to Coyote Ugly, hopped up on the bar and danced. Again, Oh. Yes. We. Did. I also got to see the Alamo finally ... like just see it from a distance since it was closed ...

I think our favorite way to spend our time in Texas is floatin the river .. or toobing as some call it (2008 pic) ...

We hit up Rockin R on the Guadalupe River this year two different days, click THIS LINK. for an idea of how that day ended. And let me give you Canadians some background info on why this happened, which was left out of the newspaper article for obvious reasons .... it is +391 degrees celcius or some crazy shit, there is a major delay in the busses getting back to our cars from where we got out of the river, there is quite easily over 500 people waiting for the busses after getting off the river, and because on the Texas rivers, there are no liquor laws.

Ok, that's unfair ... there are liquor laws and they state that no jello shooters are allowed (because of the garbage they leave, not because of any concern of alcohol intake and heat exhaustion) and only one cooler that holds 18 beer is allowed on the river. PER PERSON. I shit you not fellow Canadians ... if it wasn't for the fact that I don't care for boob and ass sweat, and quite frankly have a hard time breathing in that fucking heat, I would have already moved down there just so I can drink large quantities of cheap booze and smoke large quantities of $6 packs of smokes. And don't let the lower quantity of alcohol in American beer fool you, malt or not, I drank about half my personal river limit on the following Monday and got out of the river a little more drunk that I expected. And that float was crazy fun. I think I even met my sole-mate, Art. A hot little Mexican that gave me leg, foot, and back massages for over an hour. On the river. What a freaking life. Seriously ... WTF am I doing at work right now when I can be down in Texas, drinking, smoking, and getting my feet massaged by my sole-mate Art? Arturo actually. Art makes me think of an old balding man with false teeth .... But as I am a taken woman, I gave Arturo a few pecks on the lips cuz he was just way too cute and left him on the bus at the river. Pecks people, not french kisses. T-Bone has put no ring on my finger, nor does he really put out anymore (sex drive murderer), I did nothing wrong! Right? We spent our last night in the beautiful house in Seguin that sits along the Guadalupe River, too exhausted for much more than a meal (the Americans introduction to poutine ... nom nom nom) and a toast with Bitch Bubbly ... sorry about the crap blackberry pics, but those bottles at my boobies do say Bitch Bubbly ...

Much more tame than the previous night where we polished off a cookie tray full of jello shots .... 3 shooters high, played a drinking game, and drunk called a random men from every phone of every woman there ... Some played along, some didn't ... guess which category T-Bone and Uncle Bubba fell into?? So it was a work night. And midnight. Uh, sorry for waking you both ... I guess ... 

That pretty much sums up what I've been doing the last week. I can't believe I'm home already, sad that it ended so soon, and am already counting down the pay cheques to next year when I get to see my bitches, my very best mostly-American friends again.

More pictures to follow and make sure to keep up with Aunt Crazy's blog too for her versions of our trip. Also, I know I've been a bad blogger and haven't posted much in awhile, but life before Texas gets busy. And raising my new teenager keeps life busy. And summer makes life busy. I'm sorry followers, I even see that I've lost yet another ... sigh .... 

Ooh, and I almost forgot to mention that T-Bone was waiting at the gate with Sydneralla and a dozen roses when I came home Tuesday night. It was a nice way to come home ... sure beat last year when I had to take a cab home ... alone! because he wouldn't get his ass out of bed at 1am to pick me up after my connecting flight in Denver was delayed a few hours. Not cool T-Bone, not cool. 

one shoe. two shoe. red shoe. blue shoe. and naked barbies.

Well, first, I'd like to thank JB over at Red Shoes for thinking of me when he was given a blog award then asked/told to name 5 women he would totally do. I didn't say I was on his to-do list, but I was on his list of peeps to pass the award on to ... and that makes me feel pretty damn speshul. 1. Because the other blog awards I have received are from a blogger who I'm personal friends with and since we almost shared a wild night after tequila and youporn, she may have just given me the awards to say thanks for that. And 2. Because I really really like Red Shoes, in a blog-crush kinda way. Now that I've outted myself, here's what I won ....

Sa-weeet!

Now, the rules. I've been looking forward to this part since I found my award on Red Shoes blog ... picking 5 people that I would totally bang ... in order that they popped into my mind ...

So he was born in 1987!? What-the-hell-evah. He's young enough to train. And to impress. I really think he needs me to bang him.

 

In the car. Under the car. On top of the car. I would totally bend over for this guy. Even if he is blond.

Big package. Irish accent. Need I say more. That's right, talk dirty to me in your Irish accent (.... whoops, forgot what I was doing there for a minute ....)

Not only do I have a soft spot for a man with a belly, but I also have a soft spot for men who that with their mouths ... Ok, I admit I didn't chose the best pic to post, but it's reminds me a little of T-Bone, and well, he cranks my wheel too ....

I'd pay big bucks to have sex with this man. Just sayin.

(insert boring elevator music while I catch my breath, take a quick shower, and go for a smoke .....)

Back to Red Shoes, I'd like to give this to you as a Thank You for my naked barbie award ....

please excuse the poor quality of the blackberry picture ... and fuck no, that is not hair on my legs. Yes, I modelled the shoes for you because I thought it would a tad odd if I asked my 13 year old to do it. And I felt a little kinky modelling something for someone on my blog. These are my 2 favorite pairs of Chucks that my daughter owns. The turquoise blue and the black with purple pair ... the pair that looks like it's a high top in a low top. Bought right from Vegas that she feels so speshul wearing them because so far, she's the only Canadian she knows that has them. Thanks again for the award.

Now, I am passing it on to ... hmmmm ...

absolutely Aunt Crazy 

(I can't wait to see you, 10 more days .... )

Leiah at A Southern Belle Trying not to Rust

(was thrilled to have a one minute 3-way on the phone with you the other night ... if I wasn't in the middle of bbq-ing with T-Bone, I would have had more time to talk)

Stacey at Single in a Small Town

( I can't wait to see you, 10 more days ....)

Janie at Boobs, Ballgames, and Beer

(again because I love her last name, and her blog)

And Marty at Chaos Uncontained

(again because she brought me to Red Shoes)