Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Bozo the Gang Member?

This is a blog written yesterday and I was just about to post it, but thought I'd wait until today ... to share it with everyone taking part in True Story Tuesday over at Once Upon a Miracle.

Even just taxiing teenagers (I can say teenagers now literally because Sydnerella turns 13 in five days and all her friends are already 13), when you're not allowed to talk to them because they are in the middle of texting or listening to their song, and because, well ... you are just the chauffer, you can learn a lot from your kids just listening to their conversations. Last year for example, I learn that my daughter can speak with a punjabi accent so thick and accurate that I thought her punjabi friend was in the back seat with us. Not because this one friend taught her, but because she went to a daycare for 11 years where all the teachers were 'english as a second language'. More important things you can learn is Who is going out with who? Who broke up with who? Who does everyone hate today? All the important things in life. Sydnerella had brought up a friends name who I haven't seen or heard about in a few months. Sydnerella knew this girl since birth. I know her mom and we've coincidentally ran into each other over the years in this large city of ours .... but that tends to happen when you're raised hood. You tend to stick to the hood. So last year, our daughters graduated elementary school together, ended up on different soccer teams, and they haven't been friends since. This friend, let's call her Skittles (explanation to follow), moved on to the designated junior high of the elementary they attended together in grade six. Sydnerella moved to the junior high in the community we live in, which I've dubbed the "The Upper Hood". So when Skittles was mentioned, I asked if she talks to her on facebook and if she knows how she's doing. Only at that point, she had a real name. Now she goes by Skittles. Skittles is her gang name.

My first reaction was WTF!? "She's in a GANG". And "I'm so grateful I didn't try to work some magic to get Sydnerella into THAT school all her friends were going to". And "OMG, she's beating people up, doing drugs, is either going to kill or be killed" ... I was flipping the fuck out. But as Sydnerella gave me the full scoop, I became more and more confused ....
How is that gang related you ask? Well, apparently, the gang is called the Juggalos. Then I started to laugh a little and just on the inside. I asked Sydnerella what they juggled ... balls or bowling pins? Or maybe since they are a gang, they juggle machetes. She titled her head as if to yell, "MOM, PUH-LEASE!" So, NO, they don't juggle. But they do paint their faces! Seriously .... I was just kidding about the juggling question. I almost wondered if she was pulling my leg. But she wasn't. They paint their faces like clowns. And they listen to ICP. For those of you in your 30's, roughly, .... you KNOW who ICP is ..... and if not, well ... you probably didn't grow up in the hood. Let me introduce you to Insane Clown Posse ....

(anyone else think the clown with the red hair and the grey hoodie is a clown hottie? ... just me? ok ... moving on then ....)

And what is up with Google listing Insane Clown Posse before Sly Fox when I type that song title in? Really?

So, Skittles is a Juggalette. Paints her face and hangs out at Teen Night. Teen Night being the wave pool on Friday nights. Nobody under 12 allowed. Nobody over 17 allowed. There's loud music, dancing, swimming in jeans and tube tops, metal detectors, fights, and police. Sydnerella went once after her 12th birthday. After panicking for over thirty minutes after the pool closed while picking her up because there was such a big fight in the hallway to the change rooms nobody could get by until the police cleared it up and the paramedics treated a kid and watching the mess of couples damn near having sex on the benches from the outside windows, I decided Teen Night was not a place for MY child. Bless her heart, she agreed.  

Aside from 'having each others backs', painting their faces, listening to Insane Clown Posse, and hanging out at Teen Night, Wikipedia says Juggalos drink inexpensive soft drinks called Faygo. And fellow Juggalos include Vanilla Ice and Coolio. WTF!?

So this gang seemed a little more ridiculous than scary, but if you think about it, a gang of clowns is scary shit, see ....

Seriously fucking scary!


  1. To me a gang of anything is scary - wonder why her mother isn't alarmed?

    I don't blame you for not allowing teen nght - I don't think I would either.

    And yea - those clowns look very scary!

  2. I don't allow Savanna to go to the skating rink and thank goodness she doesn't want to go!

    That sounds kind of rAtarded to me, actually, a gang that paints their faces like clowns...stupid.

    Teenagers are the fucking devil...just sayin!

  3. Oh my goodness, her mother must be so proud!

  4. LMAO Juggalettes, huh! That is hilarious! Yet, very sad...it's never a good thing to hear about really young kids in a gang of any kind. I'm glad your daughter has more sense than that! =) You go, mom...;)

  5. That is insane! I admit I got the giggles the first time (and every time after) you mentioned the name of their gang. Hee hee!

    Thanks for linking up!

  6. did you get that last pic from Wal Mart????

    seriously, I think I saw them there the last time I went....LOL

    IPC, it had a good beat and I could dance to it, So I'd give it a -1 *snicker* the rest of the Sh@t is SERIOUSLY SCARY!!!!!

  7. That is one of the weirdest things I've ever heard! Seriously? they paint there faces like clowns?

    that's it, my kids are never leaving the house again!

  8. Hmmm.... Insane Clown Posse... kinda like Ronald McDonald and Bozo on drugs... no? ;o)

    I could see where a child could be afraid of a clown... some strange person with a painted face... something one doesnt see every day...

    wait a minute... that sounds like my last girl friend...