Friday, February 12, 2010

Hope you enjoy my money

Dear Office Thief ...

You are a slimy piece of pooh and when you are caught, I hope you end up homeless and on welfare. I believe in karma, so even if you aren't caught & fired over your sticky fingers, I believe that will happen to you one day anyway. I just hope you don't have kids that will end up starving when your stupid-ass goes down. Though I don't know yet if you are an office cleaner, an employee, or a security guard ...something will be said about the missing items in the office today! It was bad enough to walk off with our fruit, a pair of cheap sunglasses, a kitchen bowl.. Not to mention soil from someone's plant (I am serious boys and girls ... a lady in our office accused someone on this floor of stealing soil from her plant).... but now money out of my desk?! Come on you poor crack-head little fucker. I hope you feel good about stealing from a single mom you piece of shit. Sure, I wasn't relying on that money to feed my fat arse .... but I was saving it for this seasons Survivor pool. And for your information, I won that money fair and square in the last Survivor pool. Maybe you were a Survivor pool loser and jealous that I won? I don't know what your deal is, but you suck. Whether or not it was smart to leave $60 in my desk drawer is irrelevant .. it was MY $60 and MY desk. Happy Friday you chunk of cow manure .... oh, and thanks for not taking the entire $60 .. leaving me $10 was very thoughtful. Enjoy my money you ass muncher.


One pissed off joint venture analyst who won’t starve over $50 but sure wants to see you starve over $50!

I was having a great day up until 7:45am when I opened my desk drawer to dig into my Survivor pool winnings to pay Survivor Man for this pool and realized where there was once $60 .. there was now $10. I know, I know I shouldn't have left that much money in my drawer ... but it was "hidden" and I really thought it would be ok in there. Really. I think I kinda know how an old IT buddy felt when he came to work one Monday and realized money was gone from his desk, his snacks were eaten but wrappers & crumbs left all over his work station, and his chair had been sat in while the security guard enjoyed many o hours of late night porn on his computer .... yucky icky. To read more letters, or to add your own, head over to Foursons blog and link up.

Letters of Intent


  1. Wow. Stealing soil out of the pot plant? Really? $50, not $60? what a strange theif!

  2. I can't believe they rifled through your desk and found the money you had hidden. Someone has some extra time on their hands when no one else is around. I would so be telling everyone in the office that the money had been stolen. Maybe then the thief will stop or be revealed.

    Thanks for linking up and I hope your money is returned to you!

  3. This comment has been removed by the author.

  4. I can't stand a thief. And going through someone's desk is the same as going through their wallet or purse. Mean people suck! Sorry they took your money.
    (And I can't stand a typo that I missed before hitting send...sorry!)

  5. We've had an office thief in my office too-- it turned out to be the cleaning crew, and we found that out when the po-po showed up outside at 10am one morning! Needless to say, they were let go.

    I had to laugh at your "North Country" haircut... that is BAD! I actually took the time to do my hair properly this morning (only because DH had the odd morning off work); it looked better than I thought, but still too short!

    Confessions From A Working Mom

  6. We used to have someone like that in the office that I work for. We all knew who it was and no one would do anything to stop him from taking things. It got really old.

  7. That is so terrible. We had a thief in my office, but it was only food. That was annoying enough. I can't imagine money.