Monday, September 28, 2009

I fit into my fat pants today

and I was happy!! How messed up is that?! I'm not happy about having gained all this weight (although I am very happy when I'm laying on the couch with a bag of chips), but I like these pants dammit. They are a nice shade of grey with pockets in the back. They fit funny in the crotch, so they can only be worn with a longer fitting black shirt. But I found the cutest longer fitting black shirt at the little second hand boutique I love (boutique sounds so much classier than "store" or "the sally ann"). I missed these pants. They are the perfect length to wear with my black sandals for my summer outfits and also the perfect length to wear with my winter outfits. And this strange September in Calgary has been smack dab in the middle of both. We were sweatin to death in +33C just last week, but we also hit almost freezing temps of +3C just last week. Make up your mind Mother Nature. The best part of my grey pants is they are comfy. They are a stretchy type material (which generally makes my ass look like a mess hence the longer fitting shirts) that feels good on my belly. I don't have to wear a belt with the top button open, which is a pain in the ass going to washroom bause I have to dig the buckle out of my rolls. So you can see how I love these pants so.

But I wont be wearing these fat pants for long .... I start trimming the chub again tonight as a matter of fact. I'm not hittin the gym, or taking the grease out of my diet, or anything crazy like that ... tonight I start playing soccer. I watched my daughter lose some baby fat after a season of soccer, so I'm hoping the same will happen to me. Assuming that I can actually get my smokers lungs working enough to have me out on the field in longer than 30 second shifts (no I'm not going to quit smoking, that's why I found a team that was willing to take on an out of shape smoker). Assuming that I wont have a leg broken after being knocked down by a big ol' man (because my idea of playing soccer wasn't crazy enough, I agreed to play on a co-ed team). And assuming that my metabolism is still in working condition after turning 30. I was like a little kid the day before school starts yesterday picking out my soccer stuff. My kid was a great help too, in convincing me that I didn’t need expensive equipment because I’m just starting out …she’s the soccer-pro of the family so she deserves the top of line equipment. So although I have a small hate on for her right now because she's vowed to come point & laugh while I'm at practice, she had me convinced that expensive equipemt isn't going to make me any better this 1st season. I let her convince so easily mainly because I was itchin to get back home to my couch & my left over Chinese food. But I like my cheap little shin pads, they are white with removable ankle supports, and I’m pretty sure the sales guy said they are magic shin pads and will prevent shin splints. And I'll be wearing my kids hand me down soccer shoes and shorts. I’m not that cheap ..come on, I will get myself some new shorts, but for today’s practice it was either her last season shorts or my own shorts. And my own shorts are a wee-bit revealing. And not in revealing in a good way I can assure you. All they revealed was the cottage cheese on the backs of my upper legs. One of the men in my life's vision is failing as fast as the grey hairs are appearing at his temples though so he voted for the tighter shorter soccer shorts, bless his normally cold heart. But I will be looking for long shorts when I go shopping. Hell, I wonder if they’ll let me wear capri’s?

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